The Great Insect War...Part I

The Vendetta...

There is one insect that I have come to despise. In fact, as of recently I am guilty of mass insecticide against this particular group of insects.
It all started when we were using my brothers mini-van as a pickup truck. These yellow jackets built a nest in the track of the sliding door. They managed to put it where it wouldn't get crushed, but every time I opened the door, there they were. At that point they were merely a nuisance. They have become a great mennace. I learned a trick from an undisclosed source. A light shower of cold water temporarily locks up the muscles in their wings, and they drop like birds...then I step on them. A more concentrated blast from my 3 gallon pump sprayer obliterates the nest and all occupants. Well, I was on a roll. I cleaned every nest--every yellow jacket off of my brothers mini-van/truck. Life was good...for me...the yellow jackets were all dead.
About a week later, I was heavily engaged in a water fight. I was standing in my "bunker" (behind the deck) arming myself with water balloons and filling my 3 gallon pump sprayer with cold water, when I was attacked by an angry family member, no doubt, of the clan I utterly raised on my brother's mini-van/truck. This was the Wheelchair Ramp Rail Clan, close relatives of the Sliding Door, Driver's Door, and Tailgate Clans. Well, due to the affects of cold water on yellow jackets, the climax of a water fight was a bad time for retaliation on their part. They picked the wrong day! They picked the wrong fight, with the wrong guy! I was as livid as one can be when his cognitive powers are focused on an acute burning sensation caused by the south end of a north bound yellow jacket! I gave them about 3 gallons of cold water to think about, while I treated my battle wound. Then I took out my revenge! I annihilated the Wheelchair Ramp Rail Clan, and then moved on to the Exterior Recessed Spot Light Clans on the north and south sides of the peak. I atomized every yellow jacket nest I could find on our property. I even took out my revenge on an abandoned mud-dauber wasp nest that formerly belonged to the Top Left Corner Garage Door Clan of mud-daubers, distant relatives of the yellow jackets.
To all you wasps out there, and all you hornets, THIS IS WAR!! To all you bees, let your minds be at ease. My fight is not with you. Stay strong. Know that the Human race is working on a cure for CCD!
~Jim